Breaking Dawn why you gotta be like that?

[themadpoker]

I am terrified that all the Breaking Dawn spoilers are true. Because as much as I'd like to be able to say Stephanie Meyers is too good to write that sort of ridiculousity well, umm...

She isn't. =(


Chapters 1-7 were leaked. Surprise to end all surprises, Bella still can not shut up about how inhumanely beautiful Edward is. Two comparisons to an archangel so far as well as one particularly ridiculous description about how delicious his breath is. Dear God Bella.

Edward killed Bella's buzz. =DDDDD First line to make me laugh so far in this book.

Eddie C. watches the Food Network!

Is Bella pulling a Cassandra here? I am suspicious of these so called 'dreams'.

... pg. 109 I will not make the obvious joke, I will not make the obvious joke, I will NOT make the obvious joke

Oookay then. The spoilers are true. Bella's having a mutant vamp baby.

Ohgodohgodohgod. That means it's probably true that Jacob imprints on her.

Comments

[fabien-aybara.livejournal.com]

This would all make so much more sense if I'd read the book.

Which I won't. Sparkly vampires or no sparkly vampires.

[oriontyne.livejournal.com]

All I can say is that, lear Dord, I like Harry Potter so much more now. In fact, I think I'm going to take back everything I've ever said to denounce J.K. Rowling so that I can redirect my mad hater skillzZz towards the Twilight Series.

Also:

How is it that every teenage girl on this slowly-graying earth has a fetish for vampires (especially of the shiny variety??).

The shiny, I understand.
The omniprescent blood-lust, not so much.

[themadpoker.livejournal.com]

Interestingly enough, that was my exact reaction. I mean I used to say books 5 and 6 of HP read like fanfiction, but I take it back. That dubious distinction goes to Breaking Dawn. Bad fanfiction at that. JK Rowling is a shining paragon of good writing in comparison.

The shiny could overpower the bloddlust? Shininess is a pretty attractive factor. I was at the library at the other day fixated on a shiny silver book about a pop star. It didn't sound that great and I was at my book limit but I picked it up and put it back like 5 times because it was shiny! And silver! And shiny! I think I have magpie-like tendencies.